Location: via phone
When I’m confused, I tend to turn in rather than out. But I’ve often found that it helps to have guidance when turning in. Sometimes, you don’t know what you know until you start talking. To that end, I turned to hypnotherapy.
I tried hypnotherapy once before at the luxury resort Miraval in Arizona. I had some treatment credits and saw they offered hypnotherapy to deal with cravings. I figured I would try and tackle my sugar compulsion. I thought the session was very relaxing, but it didn’t actually cure my sugar habit. It did make me calm and when I’m calm I’ve noticed I don’t crave sugar. So there’s that.
More recently, I’ve been struggling with my path in life (and to be honest, eating a lot of sugary foods). Where do I want to go? What should I do? How do I get there? A friend mentioned hypnotherapy and even though I wasn’t sure how it would help, I remembered the relaxation I experienced in that Miraval session and asked her to refer me to the hypnotherapist she knew.
The hypnotherapist is a woman named Blaze. It’s not her real name but it fits her personality well. She does hypnotherapy over the phone.
I was excited for it – thinking it would reveal to me some definitive answer about where my life is going, but to my surprise I had difficulty getting into it; relaxing.
Blaze started the session by asking me about the intentions I held. I said I wanted to see what comes up, but my questions were basically what should I be doing with my life and will I find love – my usual angst.
She instructed me to close my eyes and picture a sky. She asked me what I saw in the sky. I described to her a bright blue sky with a plane going across the sky from left to right.
As we talked I found myself yawning several times, my body adjusting to her voice and my heart beat slowing.
She then asked me a series of questions and I had trouble answering them. Thoughts crowded into my consciousness and I wasn’t sure how to answer. What’s worse was that I was sitting on my bed and actual planes kept flying overhead. More planes than I’ve heard in my normally very quiet neighborhood.
She asked me again what I saw in the sky. I told her I saw a plane doing loop de loops.
Eventually, she ended the hypnosis part and we talked about the session. To start, she said that my first description of the sky was what she was actually seeing. She interpreted this as me being so anxious for answers that I put myself in her space. Almost literally.
The loops, she explained, are the two voices in my head: a big yes and a big no. "There’s something you’re saying yes to and something you’re saying no to," she said. "In order to have the entire loop you have to have the yes AND the no."
She asked if one voice was more mine or someone else’s voice. I said they were mine. At least they felt like mine – maybe one more of fear and the other of desire.
She continued by saying that the yes and no is the yearning talking. "What do I do?" I asked. Her conclusion: the "yes and no" has to go on until I embrace being peaceful and alone. "You must become peaceful with your aloneness," she said.
Here it sounds very Chinese fortune cookie-like, but it resonated with me. She went on to advise me to "follow the ideas -the ones that make you laugh, the ones that light you up, that bring you peace."
After our session, I felt a little dizzy, but happy. I’d been struggling with my meditation practice and taking the time to get back in touch with my gut. Blaze helped me sit and take time.
Ultimately, what Blaze does is a lot like guided meditation. She calms you down with her voice and instructions, and then when you’re in a more peaceful place she asks you questions. That’s when your inner self is safe to answer truthfully.
She doesn’t have the answers. You do. But they’re often masked by fear and anxiety and old voices. It’s only when those things are stripped away that the answers reveal themselves and peace is achieved.