Finding Your North Star by Martha BeckMartha Beck’s seminal tome on how to find the life you were meant to live. In it, she covers the four stages of discovery and renewal that mark every person’s journey in life. She calls them Square one: death and rebirth; Square two: dreaming and scheming; Square three: the hero’s saga; and Square four: the promised land.
Her book in Five Quotes:
1. “Teaching your social self to pay attention when your essential self says 'no' is the most basic way to reconnect the two sides of your personality.”
2. “The feeling of choked hostility, or numb depression or nauseated helplessness is a sure sign you’re steering away from your North Star, toward a life you were not meant to live. When you feel it, you must change course.”
3. “At some point, almost all my clients tell me they don’t know what they want, and it’s never true. Part of you – your essential self – knows your own desires at every moment of every day (even when the message is a contented 'I want exactly what I have, thank you'). Anytime you think you don’t know what you want, it’s because your social self has decided you shouldn’t want it.”
4. “The rule is to follow your desire. If fear and desire give the same instructions, run away. If fear and desire give opposite instructions, feel your fear and stand your ground.”
5. “No one but you has the ability to find your own North Star and no one but you has the power to keep you from finding it. No one.”
Finding Your Own North Star: Claiming the Life You Were Meant to Live.