Matchmaking Is Not So Easy

From the Talmud to Alvin Roth's blog to here: A Roman lady asked R. Jose b. Halafta: ‘In how many days did the Holy One, blessed be He, create His world”’ He answered: ‘In six days, as it is written, For in six days the Lord made heaven and earth, etc.(Ex. XXXI, 17). She asked further: ‘And what has He been doing since that time?’ He answered: ‘He is joining couples [proclaiming]: “A’s wife [to be] is allotted to A; A’s daughter is allotted to B; (So-and-so’s wealth is for So-and-so).”’ Said she: ‘This is a thing which I, too, am able to do. See how many male slaves and how many female slaves I have; I can make them consort together all at the same time.’ Said he: ‘If in your eyes it is an easy task, it is in His eyes as hard a task as the dividing of the Red Sea.’ He then went away and left her. What did she do? She sent for a thousand male slaves and a thousand female slaves, placed them in rows, and said to them: ‘Male A shall take to wife female B; C shall take D and so on.’ She let them consort together one night. In the morning they came to her; one had a head wounded, another had an eye taken out, another an elbow crushed, another a leg broken; one said ‘I do not want this one [as my husband],’ another said: ‘I do not want this one [as my wife].’

 

Midrash Rabbah (VaYikra Rabbah) Translated into English under the editorship of Rabbi Dr. H. Freedman, and Maurice Simon, Leviticus, Chapters I-XIX translated by Rev. J. Israelstam, Soncino Press, London, 1939 Chapter VIII (TZAV)

 

In other words, I've lost all hope for online dating!