Carol S. Pearson in The Hero Within: Six Archetypes We Live By shines light on what kissing frogs is ultimately about. In “The Frog Prince, a young princess drops her golden ball into the pond and is inconsolable. A frog appears and says he will get it for her if she promises that she will let him eat from her bowl and sleep on her pillow. She agrees, and he fetches the ball. Then, to her horror, her father insists she keep her word. In the version I heard as a child, the frog turned into a prince when she kissed him. Lots of jokes have made the rounds about how many frogs women kiss, hoping one will be transformed into a prince, but little attention has been paid to the princess’s suppression of disgust. The princess feels repulsed by the frog, and implicit in the story is a message that the proper young princess should repress those feelings.”
Pearson goes on to explain that Madonna Kohlbenschlag in Kiss Sleeping Beauty Goodbye "explains that in the original version of the Frog Prince story, the frog was transformed not by a kiss but only when the princess acknowledged her disgust, picked him up and threw him in the fire."
The lesson? Only when you are yourself and true to your feelings will you find your prince.